Category: inspirational

inspired posts about whatever topics God’s placed on my heart

The Voice in the Middle
inspirational · rants

The Voice in the Middle

Jaycee7 Comments

Life in 2020, huh? I mean, that statement alone could be a whole post. Halfway through the year and we’ve already faced more divisiveness than is quantifiable. I mean, forget the stuff we see online or on the television. Set aside COVID-19 and all of the socio-political news. I don’t know a single family who hasn’t personally endured multiple struggles at a greater magnitude than ever before in a single year.

Heavy stuff.

And so much noise.

Necessary noise, a lot of it. But still, everything from every direction is just so very, very loud. Polarized, too.

But you know what’s interesting to me most? When I mute the noise and dig a little deeper into quieter conversations with the people around me—diverse people from different backgrounds and beliefs—I find that few people in real life are quite as polarized as the noise makes it seem. Strong opinions and deep hurts, yes. But not everyone is adding to the noise and negativity.

Please don’t misunderstand or think I’m minimizing what’s happening out there. A whole lot of people right now are making much needed noise with valid arguments, concerns, and problems. I’m not speaking to them. I’m speaking to the rather large group along the spectrum closer to the middle. Those in the silent majority who feel voiceless or unheard because of the volume of noise created by the extreme ends of the issues. Any issue. All issues.

I’m writing to the people who feel like—pardon the blunt language—we’re damned if we do, damned if we don’t. I’m writing especially to those (Christians specifically) who choose not to engage in the noise and the arguing and the infighting. To those who feel like anything we might hope to say is either just going to cause more fighting and more noise, hurt someone unintentionally, or be completely ignored.

Why? Because these are the voices of reason that need to be heard most. You are the BOTH/AND in an EITHER/OR world. You are the dot within the yin and the yang, trying to create momentum to swirl those colors a little. You are the ones who can take action and make a difference—to spark real, lasting, positive change out there.

How? Refuse to stay complacent. Silent. And gosh, I know that’s hard right now. It’s so much easier to stay quiet and let our actions speak instead because the noise is already too much to handle. I’m an empath, so I actually get it. The sheer volume of the pain and anger and hatred in this world hurts me physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. I’ve been pretty much a gelatinous blob of feelings and nausea for weeks.

And I’m guilty of staying silent. I’m guilty of not using my God-given voice and gift for words because it’s too hard and intimidating. I’ve written well-intended social media posts, hoping to spark positive conversations, only to delete them a short while later because I could see the comments trending toward the divisive chaos.

Sometimes, silence is wisdom. Okay, most of the time. Proverbs repeatedly warns about fools running off at the mouth and the wise watching their tongue.

But you know what? This week, my silence has caused nothing but unrest. I thought I could continue as I have been, reaching out quietly under the radar to people God placed on my heart to reach out to. Reading up on all the issues, educating myself, and working practically toward being a better human, a better Christian. Praying my guts out and reading my Word. All good things. Important things that do make a difference.

Not enough, though. I feel the Spirit stirring within me, and I find that what’s happening in our world is too important to stay silent any longer. On all fronts. COVID. Racism. Elections. Fill in the blanks. Abraham Lincoln paraphrased from Luke 11:17/Mark 3:25, Jesus cautioning that a house divided against itself cannot stand. This is a truth America hasn’t been able to internalize… ever. More than just America, but humanity as a whole.

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms (Ephesians 6:12 NIV).

For most people, it’s easier to engage in these battles that divide us than to find common ground. Why? Because if our eyes are focused on ourselves and on the issues, they aren’t focused on the One who can solve them. And that, right there, is the one and only real battle for all time. See, our true enemy—Satan, the devil—knows that he doesn’t even need us to acknowledge him or his work. Humans are made in the image, the likeness, of God. And because of that, it’s so very easy to fool us into believing that we can be like God. Or that we are gods. We don’t even have to worship the devil for him to win—we’re too busy worshiping ourselves via our OWN priorities, our needs, our passions, our good intentions. The noise.

So how do we fix this mess? I mean, really. How do we fix this mess?

We’ve got to stop being distracted by X and Y, no matter how valid or necessary X and Y may be, and put our focus back up heavenward. To stop giving in to the divisive spirits around us. To be Christians first, before any of our other identities. To find the place of both/and instead of getting sucked into the either/or. And to use our voices—no longer remain the silent majority, afraid to speak because we’re damned by our society either way. And so what if we are? We don’t belong to the world. Let us not forget that God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind (or self-discipline, depending on your translation of 2 Timothy 1:7).

When our focus is on Christ foremost, our behavior and our world will change as a natural result of the Kingdom coming on earth as it is in heaven.

Ephesians 4 tells us that in speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become the mature body of Christ. So I encourage you, my friends, my brothers and sisters, to seek out the both/and in the issues before us. To continue being that sliver of overlap in a Venn Diagram. Because it IS POSSIBLE to both/and. You can like rock AND country music, right? Or love heels AND flats, contemporary romance AND historical. We can both/and with real issues, too.

You can both socially distance AND find ways to love your neighbor. You can be both respectful of the government AND skeptical of it. You can support the Black community AND respect police officers. You can know that #BlackLivesMatter AND other lives do too (does that really need saying?). You can disagree with the President or Pelosi AND still respect their authority. You can forgive someone AND still hurt. You can speak up for Truth AND do so with love, kindness, and respect.

Let’s keep Ecclesiastes 7:18 also in mind: It is good to grasp the one and not let go of the other. Whoever fears God will avoid all extremes (NIV), or as the Message puts it, It’s best to stay in touch with both sides of an issue. A person who fears God deals responsibly with all of reality, not just a piece of it.

And most importantly, listen to the Spirit at work in you as you keep your eyes trained on Him instead of solely the world around you. Speak when He prompts, but always in truth and in love. And if you can’t recall what it means to speak in love, re-read 1 Corinthians 13, which is the best definition for figuring out how to reflect God, who IS LOVE.

Wisdom knows the difference between when to stay silent, when to amplify the voice of others, and when to speak up. Seek Him for that wisdom, and follow His prompting. But always, always, listen, speak, and act with love at the forefront. 

All scripture quotations taken from the YouVersion Bible app.

I am not a blogger.
about me · books · inspirational · Uncategorized

I am not a blogger.

Jaycee

Just in case you didn’t realize that. Because, you know, I haven’t posted anything since January. And I released a book in April, so that was a total fail if I’d ever intended to become one. But I’m not, so that’s cool.

I admire those brave souls who constantly come up with interesting content, become influencers in industry and culture, and use their voices to share their awesomeness. But, again, I am not a blogger. What I am is an indie author, wife, and mama with a whole lot of energy, and yet still not enough time to do it all well enough that my recovering perfectionist self can be satisfied with the results.

Oh, and I’m turning forty this weekend. So…that’s fun. I’m surprisingly okay with admitting that number. I’ve been told I don’t really look it (liars, but I love you), and I know I definitely don’t act it (thank you, ADD and teenage daughters). But more than anything, I feel like I’m standing on this great mountaintop in my life, and I’m looking across a nice, wide summit at this amazing gift called life. And it’s good.

Last weekend, I hiked the Domingo Baca/TWA Canyon trail in the Sandia Mountains. My husband did it about twenty years ago and always told stories about it. We’ve waited and waited until the kids were old enough to make it without complaining too much or needing to be carried. And finally, this was the year!

If you’ve ever read any of my books, you’ll know how much I love my mountains. After a rather stressful school year and start to summer, this was an absolute joy of a day. All five of us grabbed our backpacks and plenty of water and ventured out into an overcast day with a 20% chance of thunderstorms. Not exactly optimal weather, but we prayed it would hold out until we were finished.

 

It was pretty much the equivalent of climbing UP the stairs in our two-story house for five straight hours, stopping to rest, eat, sip, and shutterbug, and then climbing down those stairs for two more. Yes, the incline was pretty much the same. Not kidding.

But for about an hour in between the going up and coming down, we explored the wreckage of a Martin 404 airplane, TWA flight 260, that crashed in 1955. Sixteen people lost their lives in this accident, and most of the information is hard to come by online. But being up there in the middle of it was sobering and adventure-inspiring all at the same time. To walk among tragedy and see how nature has taken it over was absolutely incredible.

I came home with my family that day feeling uplifted in a way I haven’t in years. Connected with my people, connected with my home, connected with God. (And cool story there–every time the sun came out too hot, or it started to rain, I prayed for the weather to hold out. Same with our energy. No sooner did we make it to the car than the sky opened up and poured! And we were drained and sore, but we did it!) Over seven miles in a day, and we did it.

It was exactly what I needed to reset my perspective on life. While I may not be much of a blogger, I am definitely a connector. I need to connect to things, to people, to places, and to Jesus, above all.

And while turning forty sounds pretty scary to a younger person, I’m taking it with a joyful heart that’s ready to stare across the summit of life’s steep climb with the satisfaction knowing how hard it was to get here at times. The air’s nice. So’s the view. I’m in no hurry to climb down, either.

If you’ve made it down this far into my not-really-a-blog post, you’re in for a treat! In honor of my July birthday this weekend, I am giving away my Christmas (in July, haha!) novella, Love, Laughter, and Luminarias for FREE July 12-14! So head on over to Amazon and download it before it’s over. To find what it’s all about, see my BOOKS page! You can also read about my latest release, the third installment in the Everyday Love series, What Makes a Home over there.

And just because I feel like it, I’d love to give away two eBooks of What Makes a Home! Because it’s my birthday and I can do what I want, I’ll give one copy to a random commenter BELOW, and another to the friend of their choice!

*Open internationally to a valid email address. Not endorsed by any entity but me.*

 

 

 

Halloween is over, Thanksgiving is coming, but it’s never too early for CHRISTMAS!
books · inspirational · Uncategorized

Halloween is over, Thanksgiving is coming, but it’s never too early for CHRISTMAS!

Jaycee

Okay, so maybe it is a little early for Christmas. But in the wild world of publishing, it’s never too early to release a Christmas book. So…my newest book baby is born today, Love, Laughter, and Luminarias. You can find out what it’s about in the link.

What I’d like to share today is what a stinkin’ little miracle this book is for me as a writer.

I’d been working on a different holiday story and it just wasn’t going where I wanted it to. I was stuck. And by stuck, I mean, I hated the leading lady, hated how I couldn’t move the story forward, and I seriously considered my first three books an utter fluke because I must be a two-bit hack to write myself into a corner I couldn’t find a way out of. So where did I turn? Naturally, to prayer.

Which led me to reason 8,974,301 why I know God loves me. On my way to a dinner with two girlfriends from church, I was praying HARD for direction, and then…after three weeks of zero words, BAM. I had a fully outlined first chapter and character sketch for Garrett, my hero. After we said our goodbyes earlier than usual, I decided to hit up Starbucks, knowing they’d be open at least another hour. By the time I left, I had the first chapter WRITTEN, a full sketch for Nina, my heroine, AND a clear answer from the Lord. Not even kidding you, in the car on the way home I clearly heard His pressing that if I would fast from reading for the next week, then He would give me this story faster than I’ve written anything, ever. (Do you even understand how HARD that was to process?! If you’re an avid reader, you get it.) But when Jesus tells you to do something, it’s smart to snap to it and get with the program.

I survived.

And I wrote this 24k word novella in two weeks. TWO. WEEKS. Never have I done anything like that before.

And now, as I gear up for NaNoWriMo (just Google it), I feel a little more confident that I can win that, too. Which might just mean all of you who’ve been waiting on Caleb’s story, AKA the third Everyday Love book, you might just get it into your hands before next spring after all! Yee haw!

And if you love books AND giveaways, well LitRing is offering up this one, which LL&L is happily featured in! It’s only available in eBook format right now, but if you don’t have a kindle, don’t worry! Amazon offers a free app for all tablet and mobile devices! And this book is only 99¢. So go get it!

Merry ThanksChristmasGiving season!

Jaycee

 

It’s a hike, not a roller coaster.
inspirational · Uncategorized

It’s a hike, not a roller coaster.

Jaycee

A lot of people use the roller coaster as an analogy for life. I say it’s more like an intense hiking trip.

We have this trail here in Albuquerque called the La Luz trail. It’s something like seven miles long, each way.

When I was younger, a bunch of teenage boys and girls from youth group all in shorts, tees, and ball caps, some in sneakers and others in boots decided to brave the ninety-plus degree summer heat and tackle it. We started out together, laughing and joking around, and gradually, a few of the boys and I think one of the more brazen girls took the lead, determined to get to the top. A huge group of us took the middle, and eventually a few fell behind and mostly complained about the heat.

And it was hot. By the end of the day, most of us turned back, but I’ll never forget the faces of my friends who’d braved the entire hike up and then arrived late to our youth night that evening, still red-faced and sweaty, but with the pride of having also hiked it back down. I still remember feeling the regret that perhaps I’d given up too easily and the envy that I couldn’t claim to have conquered the trail with these guys. (That’s me in the center with the white tee and hat and about half the group.)

This trail starts out in a wide expanse of nature’s attempts at greenery, namely brown grasses and scattered cacti. It feels like an easy, unshaded, long walk through the desert and just when you’re pretty sure you’re going to die of heatstroke, you come upon a change in the scenery. Huge rocks line the trail in places, and the plant life looks a little thicker. If you can stick it out, then you’ll mercifully find that the higher and steeper the incline becomes, the closer you are to the treeline. Depending on the time of year, you might even still find remnants of snow the higher you go. Now, the trail has anywhere from a 9% to 40% incline, so it’s never boring. Like most of New Mexico, the surroundings change drastically with every new twist and turn you take. One minute it’s hot, dry, and rather ugly, and the next, it’s stunningly beautiful.

Now, if you’re one of the die-hards who can make it to the top (which I’m sad to say, I never did), you’ll be rewarded with an incredible view of the city. Absolutely incredible. I’ve driven to the top of the crest more times than I can count, so I know where the trail dumps out. It’s a brief walk across the top of my favorite mountain to the Sandia Peak Tramway, the longest aerial tramway in the United States, third longest in the world. A lot of people hike up the trail and take the tram back down, or vice versa. Some have friends pick up them up. The bravest make the fifteen-ish-mile round trip and know the explosive pride of victory. I found a great blog piece that really describes it well.

Okay, so back to the top. I have a ridiculous penchant for viewing everything through analogies. In everything, I see a comparison to something else.

For real life, I see a hike up the La Luz. There are seasons of barren, desolate wasteland like the bottom of the trail. Multiple choices laid out, different paths to choose that lead to the top. There are rocky seasons ahead, when you have to decide whether to stick to the trail or give those boulders a good climb to see what’s on the other side. There are times when you’re ready to give up and turn back because it’s just too hard, too exhausting, too daunting to continue. All the moments when you’re surrounded by friends, and then eventually the pack is sorted out and you’re left in front, in the middle, or straggling behind. Sometimes alone.

For those who keep moving forward, the seasons of shade and growth come. Restorative seasons, with places to rest and enjoy the surroundings. Times of wonder and admiration. Moments where the trees are so thick you’re in darkness, but then the sunlight breaks through again. Climbing, climbing, all the while. Sometimes up, sometimes down, changing direction as needed but trying to stay on course even with plenty of opportunities to veer elsewhere. And then finally, the crest. Victory. The seasons of knowing you’ve made it, relishing in the sweetness of accomplishment and success.

All to turn and find it’s time to make the journey back down all over again. Maybe a nice, smooth ride like the tram. Maybe with friends who’ve picked you up. Or maybe on your feet, making those ups and downs and switchbacks through more seasons of beauty and barren desolation amid rocks and thorns and pockets of beauty.

Such is life, but it’s beautiful. My hope for you today is that you’ll enjoy the climb.

Crap, now I’m going to have Miley Cyrus singing that in my head all day. Ha! And now so will you. Like her or not, that song is lyrical genius. It’s not about how fast you get there. It’s not about what’s waiting on the other side. It’s the climb.

What are you climbing for? Who are you climbing with? As for me, I just want to get to the top and back down again with that red face, sweaty and exhausted, but knowing I did it. I made it. I have no regrets and I’d do it all again and again just to feel the gut rush and satisfaction.

Maybe this summer I’ll take my family and make that literal climb. But regardless, I’ll be enjoying life’s climb. The ups and downs, even the barren places and switchbacks–because I know that the shelter and shade of the One who made me is there, and He’s got a beautiful view and victory waiting.

Bouncing Back!
about me · inspirational · Uncategorized

Bouncing Back!

Jaycee

It’s a good day. Why? I’m still alive and kicking, that’s why.

About a week ago now, I had major surgery. I knew it was coming, and I was mostly prepared for it. I’ll back up.

So last August, I had some severe abdominal pain that I wasn’t sure was appendicitis, gall bladder, ovarian cyst, or what. I had signs that it could be any of the above and it was the devil. Within a couple of weeks, though, I had some nice images of a lovely uterine nodule that was embedded in the too-thick lining of my too-big uterus as well as signs of pretty angry cysts in both ovaries. I was able to get into a specialist here in town (who I instantly adored) after a second round of ultrasounds showed the same thing, only better and worse in different ways. By round three, that pesky nodule had grown and looked cranky.

She recommended we take the uterus since I’ve been blessed with my three girls and we’ve been done having babies for a while. We made the plans, I dealt with the frequent pain from those cysts and nodule cycling through, well, my cycle, and protesting their frustrations loud and proud. Life goes on. I prepared best I could at home, getting the house spic and span like any neurotic recovering perfectionist would, making meals for the freezer that could be cooked later, teaching the kids how to do laundry and other things. The night before I made sure everyone understood the depth of my love. And that if the worst happened, they better remember never to bury me or have an open casket of any kind, ever, because I will come back and angry haunt them. Nuh uh, no way. They already knew that, of course, because I’ve made my opinion known on that lots of times. I’m kind of morbid like that.

And then, I spent most of the night before praying and reminding the Lord that while I love Him and look forward to being in glory, eternity can wait another 50 years, thank you very much. If that’s His will, of course. But seriously, Lord. Not til I’m 90 something, okay? A thousand years is but a day to Him and all that. These are the thoughts of a crazy lady trying not to let anxiety rule before the scariest surgery of her life. I’d put off processing my emotions really until that night like any good procrastinator does. (Side note, that’s what procrastination usually is–perfectionism delayed because we don’t want to face failure or fear or flaws.)

Anyway, my incredibly wonderful hubby and I go into the hospital while normal, sane people are still asleep and get checked in and prepped. My mom gets there and we’re joking around until I get one little dose of meds in the IV and wake up hours later sore and woozy. Weirdest experience ever, waking up somewhere else knowing your body’s been sliced and yanked and sewn up without your awareness. Surgery takes a whole lot of faith for a control freak.

So now it’s been almost a week. I’ve been mostly resting while trying not to command the troops too forcefully. They’re all amazing, by the way. Friends showing up with dinner, family helping care for and cart around the kids, and my immediate gang pitching in often and wonderfully.

It’s still not all smooth sailing, though. Bouncing back is hard work.

It’s hard to rest when you’re used to doing and doing. It’s hard to let others help you and shut your mouth because they’re not doing it your way, even when you realize expecting that is so rude and makes you sound like a controlling monster. It’s hard when your heart is grateful but your mind is frustrated that you only have the energy for a few minutes’ walk to the bathroom and to get water before you have to rest again. It’s hard when you know that everyone already has so much on their plates that you don’t want to add more, which is why you do everything you do in the first place. It’s hard when you can’t alleviate those burdens and need to be on the receiving end. It’s hard to express that you’re thankful for what everyone is doing but you’re a jumbled mess.

It’s hard when your body is just realizing that all of its normal hormone-balancing parts are gone and the job is left to one little lone ovary to figure herself out. It’s hard when the emotions start processing whether you want them to or not, and suddenly you’re crying buckets one minute and wanting to hit something the next, trying not to get hurt over stupid things, still needing to intervene when the kids are bickering, and yet wanting to crawl into a hole and sleep for days ALL IN THE SAME HOUR. It’s hard when every day feels different, physically and emotionally.

The good news is, it’s temporary. I’m still here and taking more steps forward than back. I’m learning new things everyday about myself, about my strengths and weaknesses. Realizing changes I need to make within myself to better serve my family like I’m supposed to be. Why is it we so easily become stuck in our ruts and routines and don’t realize the things we’ve let slide until there’s a major upheaval?

So I’m grateful I needed this procedure. Sure, there’s a lot of hard stuff to face and deal with afterward. Physically, emotionally, even spiritually. But it’s going to be so much better in the long run. There’s a lot to look forward to physically once I’ve healed, but it’s the emotional and spiritual journey that this has kickstarted I’m most looking forward to. I’m not yet all that I want to be, and God let me wake up afterward so that I can get there. He’s given me time and the desire to make things better and become who He’s made me to be. He’s reignited my eternal spark of hope that’s getting ready to burst into flame once more for Him, for His will in me, in my life, and in my family. For that, I’d go through all of the hard stuff a thousand times, and worse. Because like Romans 5:3-5 says:

“Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.”

It’s spring, and I’m alive. There is hope, for those who take the seasons of upheaval and persevere to learn something. I don’t want to miss my chance. So while there’s not a lot I can do right now as I recover physically, there’s a lot I can do inside (or rather, a lot Jesus can do in me). I’m not going to waste this season.

Come on, Jesus!

Hope and Glory
inspirational · Uncategorized

Hope and Glory

Jaycee

Hope. That’s the word that most often comes to mind when I think of how spring feels. But, even though flowers and eggs have replaced pumpkins and leaves in our decor, the need for thanksgiving hasn’t been replaced in my heart.

Today is Easter, a day that represents so much. And with all that it represents, all that it means, my heart is full of too much to find the right words to adequately express how I feel today. So I will give glory instead.

Glory to God for His care of me.

Glory to God for His care of my family.

Glory to God for inspiration, perseverance, and mercy.

Glory to God for miracles that still happen, big and small, seen and unseen.

Glory to God for grace unending. Grace that covers a multitude of shortcomings. Grace that gives new life and new hope and says that you’re never too far gone to make a course correction.

Glory to God for His Love. Love that said, “I can’t bear the thought of eternity without my people. I will make a way.” Love that looked within and said, “My Son will be that way. The way, the truth, the life.” Love that the built the bridge across the divide with a pure and humble life and set a living example for how to live freely and get along with others, even when they hate you for it. Love that was taunted, assaulted, and broken without fighting back. Love that was bloodied and brutalized and mocked. Love that then prayed His forgiveness for all of those things and all of the things hundreds of generations had yet to do as He wheezed His last breaths. Love that died on a cross in this world, defeated the devil in the next, and came back to this world on the Third Day. Love that could’ve said, “Ha! In yo’ FACE!” but said, “Check out my scars. I told you this would happen and that when all seemed lost I’d be back.” Love that sent His Spirit to stick around forever, so that though the devil still had the freedom to play and mess with the world, His Spirit would lift up believers and remind them they’re never alone and there’s still victory. That someday, He’d be more than just spirit again and we’d see His face and though bodies might die and journeys might not be easy, burdens might not be light, we come to Him and it’s better. Because Love conquers all. Love wins. Even when all seems lost, there is Hope on the Third Day because LOVE IS.

Glory to the One who called Himself I AM. Because He Is. And because God is Love, so Love Is. Before, during, after; a circle that never starts or stops. He just is, His love just is, and it’s yours if you only believe and call Him.

Glory to the One who calls me. Calls me His child, calls me to Him, calls me to live and breathe and do. Calls you.

There’s so much more I’d love to write, but that’s all I’ve got today. Be blessed. Love others. Snuggle a little closer to the One who loves you. His arms are open, ready, and waiting. You’ve never gone too far that you can’t come home again. You are loved. Never, ever lose hope. Because just like spring comes after the losses of fall and the dead of winter, a new season of life and love and beauty will come for you, too. There is always hope.

Connection isn’t just a buzz word.
about me · inspirational · Uncategorized

Connection isn’t just a buzz word.

Jaycee

Cue deep breath, followed by long sigh. Okay. I can write now.

So it’s been awhile, and I’m not the most faithful at blogging. Not that I have a ton of subscribers to impress anyway, nor is that my goal. So what is my goal, you ask? Easy. I just want to have a place to write and share a little of who I am.

In this crazy busy world of polarized opinion over-sharing and character counts, I’m looking for a little something more.

Connection. I think that’s ultimately what we all crave.

Our need for connection is woven into the very fiber of our existence. We seek connection within ourselves, the world around us, in relationships with other people, and especially spiritually. Connecting ourselves to new information, texts we read, things we hear, and pretty much every experience we have is actually a vital element to learning even from a young age. We feel positively about the things we connect with personally.

So. Connection. It’s one of those buzz words all over the place these days, as people begin to realize how we’ve allowed ourselves to become isolated. And we have done this.

We join social media, but become disheartened by the climate there or distracted and disillusioned by the highlights we see peeking in on others’ lives. Maybe we take the time now and then to connect in person. Maybe we don’t. We spend a little too much time inside working, living, doing. We’re busy. Some of us put ourselves out there over and over again and receive bupkiss in return. Or, if you’re like me, you make really great friends for a while and then–bam!–they move away. (So many times! I tell you, if you want to leave Albuquerque, let’s be friends. I try not to feel cursed.)

But I digress.

So many of the problems on the rise in our country could be resolved and prevented by this one simple concept of truly connecting. Think about it. Suicide rates, school shootings, racial tensions, the polarization of public opinions. Yes, there are extenuating factors making each issue more complex. But at the very heart of things, as we lose face-to-face connection with other people, as we focus more on ourselves, as we keep from doing the things we love and enjoy, spend more time indoors and less in nature, we lose more and more connections. The very connections that make us who we are as a person, but also as a people.

So how do we find connection when we have an infinite list of reasons to remain distracted, isolated, withdrawn, or in our little family bubble?

I find it’s easiest to start physically. I’ve recently gone back to practicing yoga, and my Christ honoring instructor pointed out how important it is we feel connected to the very ground under our feet. She wanted us to really feel the floor with our hands and feet while the rest of our bodies are twisting like pretzels. And guess what? It makes sense. That physical connection opened my heart back up to checking out the world around me, and looking for other broken connections.

When I look up and around, the first thing my eyes are always drawn to are the Sandia Mountains.

This isn’t even that great of a shot. But look at those pretty Watermelon Mountains (in case you wondered what Sandia means). Every time I look at them, I marvel at the way they never look the same. And I mean never. You could do a time-lapse over a year and it would be a crazy mix of colors, clarity, brightness, depth, and mystery. I could write an ode or sonnet about all the things I love about my mountains. As long as I can see them, I feel connected to my home. I come back to ABQ from a long trip, and as soon as I catch sight of them my heart wants to leap from its chest and sing, “I’m home! I’m home!” Sure, they’re small compared to the mountains further north or across the world, but they’re mine.

When I turn away from the mountains to face west, I catch an expanse of the most incredible sky in the world. Yes. I said that. New Mexico has incredibly blue skies, and the sunsets here are like nowhere else. Whenever I’m driving westward in the late afternoon, I feel like God has painted a spectacular work of art just for me. Just. For. Me. I don’t care how many people live here and see it. He did it for me, and you can’t tell me differently. Because connecting to the artistry and beauty of creation opens my heart and spirit to connect with God himself. And a spiritual connection is ultimately what we’re all created for in the first place. So get out there and connect to your world, your environment. Experience it. Put down the distractions more often and let your love for a place ground you and start healing those wounded places.

Once you’ve reset yourself again, you’re ready to get out there and make human connections again. And let’s face it. We all go through seasons of isolation and withdrawal. We get tired and frustrated and it’s easier to not put ourselves out there anymore to avoid the hurt. Or we become “too busy,” allowing our busy-ness to make us feel more important and significant. All that does is elevate us onto a different plane away from the very thing we need most, other people. Even you introverts out there. You need your people. Small, controlled doses with plenty of solo time after, but you need them, too. And you extroverted introverts (like me) who need to be surrounded by people, but it’s like pulling teeth to get you there past the dread and temptation to cancel. I see you, I know how you are. Suck it up, buttercup, and make a plan with somebody and stick to it. You need it.

I won’t go on about all the ways we can foster our interpersonal connections because what each of us needs varies greatly from person to person. I just want to encourage you to find a small way to actually do it. Start with your little world around you. Throw yourself back into something that you love, or pursue that person you’ve lost touch with. Reconnect with your faith, even if it’s just a quick prayer of “Hey, God, I’m still here. Sorry I’ve ignored you lately.”

Make one connection today, and maybe another one tomorrow.

If we all just got outside ourselves for a minute, think of the good we could do in this world.

about me · inspirational · Uncategorized

When all you want to do is ____________…

Jaycee

..and everything else has to take priority.

It’s not fun. Let me tell you. I’ve been re-reading Gina and Jaydon’s story for weeks just to remind myself what’s going on in their lives so that I can stay consistent with where I want them to go. Plus, you know, edits. Lots and lots of edits.

But I can’t seem to get the time to sit and finish the story as quickly as I want to. Does that ever happen to you? You’ve got this nice long goals list, or…wait for it…New Year’s Resolutions (gag, choke, puke) that you’re ready to commit to and raring to go. And then? BAM! Life happens.

You get sick. The kids get sick. Oh, and there’s work. The house. Dinner, every night. Activities and chaos and and and and and–whew!

You know what I’m talking about.

So here’s another reminder for all my fellow recovering perfectionists out there. Let it go (shut up, Elsa, I hate you). But seriously, it’s okay to let go of those icky, stressed out feelings that are keeping you from achieving those goals. The rigidity that comes with perfectionism says it’s all-or-nothing, success or fail. But that is a LIE. The truth is, there is peace in the balance. There actually is a middle ground, a place where you’re mostly succeeding and not letting the little shortcomings derail you–remembering that the small things really are small things.

A heads up for those of you who are not perfectionists (you lucky schmucks) but are probably married or related to one, that overachievers are more likely to be procrastinators and feel really, really guilty for breaking those resolutions or not completing our lists. And the anxiety that comes with those failures sucks. It makes us annoying jerks who snip and snap at everyone around us, and when you point and laugh (I can admit that from the outside, perfectionist freak outs are pretty amusing) it only reminds us that we’ve screwed up and heaven forbid we’ve had a witness to a failure.

Thank God for maturity, though. If my thirties have taught me anything, it’s that life happens and I’m much happier if I just roll with it as it comes. It’s a struggle, I’ll admit, when my first nature is to stress out and get annoyed with myself for not being superhuman enough to accomplish it all.

Like Brynn in my first book, I have to remember that “Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails” (Prov. 19:21 NIV). As long as I am keeping my eyes on the One who knows what needs to happen where and when, then things really will fall into place. Like Ecclesiastes 3 says, to everything there is a time and a season.

Today, it’s my time to work on my website, social media, and getting things updated. Tomorrow it’s a day of substitute teaching and shuttling children. This weekend it’ll be family time and taking care of the house. But Monday? Six hours of writing. A full, dedicated day to do what I both want AND need to do.

So I encourage you–when you’re overwhelmed by the failures and breaking resolutions and the pace of life going too fast for you to squeeze it all in–relax, let go of the frustrations, and remind yourself that the balance feels better than the stress. Because you’re going to get done what you can, when you can, and stressing out and treating everyone around you like crap isn’t going to help anything. You may as well enjoy the highs and lows, because that’s where you’ll find the balance. It’s resting, even in the pursuit.